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Learning to let go and live in the grace that is already given to us.

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Jessica Jordana

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Goals Update ||March||

March 25, 2017 Jessica Paxson

The past two weeks have marked a first I never had on my radar: The death of a former student.

Although many pages in my notebook detail my thoughts and reflections on this event, I am realizing that sometimes deep emotions and difficult pondering have to live inside my notebook for a little bit longer--possibly indefinitely.  

So, in the interest of keeping my promise to myself of posting once a week, I decided now would be a great time to give my maybe-monthly update on my goals for the year.  

I think I eventually will write something addressing the tear-stains that lie only a page-flip away from today's journal entry.  I will write something, not because I want to or because it doesn't wrench my soul, but because it is my duty as a writer.  

It sounds hefty and philosophical, but I truly believe it is the gut-turning task of a writer to parse through difficulties that others may avoid or bury in the hopes that a little more light might be shed on a difficult path for those who trod and crawl on the rocky roads after us.  

But, again, that will be for another day; a day when the emotions have taken root in my notebook and have flourished into words and not just grunts and rants.

This goal update is for my progress in February and in March, since March is almost OVER. (HOLLA!)

Goal #1: Read 52 books this year. (ONE BOOK BEHIND SCHEDULE) Unlike January, I only managed to read two books in February.  Part of the reason was that I got about halfway through two different books which I decided to abandon.  Abandoning books is very hard for me, but I just wasn't feelin' it.  I always tell my students, "Your time is too important to read books you don't like."  I always forget to take my own advice.  Then, in March, I recovered and have already finished four books, and am halfway through two more as we speak.  Since February, I've read Go Ask Alice, Thirteen Reasons Why, Wild, Me Before You, Writing with Mentors, and Between the World and Me.  I'm very proud of this list, because I think it definitely exhibits what Penny Kittle calls the reading roller coaster.  She claims that real readers read difficult and challenging texts, as well as texts that are great stories or comforting/entertainment reads.  Overall, I feel great about my reading goals this year.

Goal #2: Establish a sustainable exercise practice. (ON TRACK, STILL IMPROVING) Alright, real talk here.  I'm struggling between the fitness that I want and know I can have, and the work I am willing to put in to get there.  Anybody with me?

Here's a question: Who wants to sign up for a race or something with me?  I think I need some sort of fire lit beneath me so that I HAVE to do things.  Does anyone else operate that way?  Knowing that I have a race or a goal or something of that sort, and I actually might die if I don't train, makes things work a little better.  

Goal #3: Submit writing for publication; aim for at least 5 NO's. (NEEDS MORE WORK)  I have never enjoyed writing as much as I have in the past few months.  It has been an amazing joy to get to know the ladies of Three Teachers Talk, and--by extension--other educators with whom we have the privilege of conversing.  I also had an article featured on Circle Seven Five's new online magazine, CityGuide.  I will also have the privilege of writing for my friend Lindsay, again, in the next few months.  I have not, however, taken as many risks as I should have by this point.  I have not been turned down.  Does anyone have a place that you think I should submit my writing that might be a risk to go after?  I've considered looking up submission information for The Everygirl (I've talked with them before, and they are great!), Real Simple, Magnolia Journal, and possibly a few other educational websites.  I honestly think I just need MORE TIME!  

Goal #4: Experiment with different ways of assessing independent reading.  Shana wrote about reading logs and grading independent reading last week after reading Pernille Ripp's manifesto to STOP THE GRADING.  The way I've worked more toward this goal is simple--MORE CONFERENCING + MORE BOOK TALKS.  I got away from talking about books I'm reading as consistently simply because of fear.  I was afraid I couldn't be passionate enough about a book to convince anyone to read it.  I was afraid I hadn't read enough books to be able to recommend.  I've found that if you are talking to kids about what they are reading, that is sometimes the most efficient way of assessing a student's growth in creating a reading life.  I also hope to have a cumulative project by the end of the year in which students communicate how reading has changed their thinking.  (Stealing your idea, Lisa!)

Goal #5: Apply to Graduate School. (CHECK!)  I've applied, and I've been accepted!  I start in May on a ONE-YEAR Grad Program.  Gulp.  The program is Educational Psychology with an emphasis in Gifted and Talented.  My new goal is to pass my first three classes (May through August) with flying colors.  The colors represent the new neural pathways that will be carved at lightning speed. (Nerd alert?)

Goal #6: Apply for the Book Love Foundation Grant. (CHECK!) I'm still praying like a broken record about this one, and I'm considering applying for another grant.  I need to get on it, PRONTO.  IF YOU BUILD THE CLASSROOM LIBRARY, THE BOOKS WILL COME--English Teacher Field of Dreams??  Anyone?

That's it for today!  Happy almost APRIL, everyone.  

Jess, xoxo

Tell me in the comments one goal that you've kept up with and one you've failed this year--I want to hear about it!

 

← On BecomingThe Savior Complex →

Jess Jordana: Girl behind the blog, in front of the classroom and typically sporting the faint smell of iced coffee and essential oils.

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I hate waiting. Like REALLY hate it. I start my coffee in the morning, and then pack my lunch as it’s brewing because I’m allergic to waiting in silence and staring for 30 seconds. •••
I had to go back this week and read my own blog post from Sunday. In this season I feel like I’m waiting for white space, quiet, stillness. If anyone has waited out the end of the year with seniors in a core class, you know it’s none of those things.
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But then I remembered the coffee brewing and my frantic dash to get just one more thing done.  I wonder what would happen if I quit begging for what I don't have and just cherish what I do right now?  Maybe God hasn't given me full days of white space, but maybe he intends those 30 seconds as I wait for my coffee to be life-giving.
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What pockets in your day do you maximize for productivity's sake?  Could you use that time to wait, sit, SOAK, instead of rush, control, or DO? ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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#whitespace #weekendvibes #chasingslow
When your weekend should look like this:
•Write grad school paper
•Clean
•Grade
•Blog post
•Send client emails
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But it actually looks more like this 💃:
☕️Coffee (repeat as necessary)
🙌🏻Gathering inspo for my prayer wall
👯‍♀️Sending texts to friends about getting matching shirts
🕺🏻Waiting on my hot piece to get home for date night!  How are you balancing the “should’s” and the “want-to’s” this weekend? ••••
At least I have something to wear! (Have you guys checked out @carlyjeanlosangeles ?  I'm officially obsessed with their simple, comfortable, capsule style! Go check 'em out! I’m wearing and loving the Britta sweater, but they have tons of good stuff!)
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(Not pictured: The awkward frappucino lid that they put on my regular iced coffee🙄🤷🏼‍♀️ Come on Starbs.)
📸 Cred: That "hot piece" of a husband I have!
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#cjlagirls #cjlatagmail #darlingweekend #coffeeholic
If I had to name a theme song for my twenties, it would be "You Can Go Your Own Way" by Fleetwood Mac.
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(Okay, let's call it a "theme lyric" because I don't know what the rest of it is about.) •••
Picture yourself going through life, making a decision, and then that tune plays, 🎶You can go your own wayyyyyy 🎶 Really, Fleetwood Mac?! I can?! You know what? You're right! •••
You do you, boo.  Stay in your lane.  Draw your own circle.
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Don't craft the life you think you should have instead of the one you actually want. •••
But in all seriousness, how many ways are there to eat an avocado?! What's your fave combo? (let me hear it in the comments!) 🥑🌮🍞
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Oh... and more on the blog, today! ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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#thatsdarling #avocadolove #cultivatewhatmatters
"They rested quietly on the Sabbath as commanded." -Luke 23:56 (MSG)
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This year's Holy Week has surprised me with a lesson in THE WAIT.  It amazes me that Jesus' beloved friends simply rested the day after his death.  They didn't start on a rampage of revenge, they simply continued to obey in faithfulness.
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THE WAIT is what makes this a true love story of God's glory.  Jesus knew far before the Judas and his whispered betrayal.  Yet, he didn't wait in resentment, he waited IN FAITHFUL ACTION, he waited ON MISSION, he waited IN FEARLESS COMMUNITY, he waited IN PRAYER. •••
Then, after Jesus spoke the words, "It is finished," God waited.  The Holy Father of Jesus didn't rush to revive his only son.  Even though God knew what came next, I know He mourned on this day, the day in between complete darkness and eternal light.
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Glory takes time.  Cherish the wait.  Faith grows here, beneath the ground, preparing the way for the beauty of new life.
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And now we wait.
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#soulscripts #soulscriptsisterhood #heisrisenindeed #shereadstruth 
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Are you ever afraid that you’re too much? (🙋🏼‍♀️ let’s be real. I am.)
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All this talk about “not enough,” and I realized the narrative running through my head 25/8: Is this too much, too far, too in-your-face? •••
This lie that Satan tells us is that we have to ride that ever-boring, non-kingdom-illuminating line of mediocrity, when WE WERE MADE FOR MORE. This week reminds me to play big and go all in because I know a God who died for me, so that I could live with Him in eternity. If that doesn’t warrant a little TOO MUCH, then I don’t know what does. Too much, not enough, kick those lies to the curb, sister. Tag a friend who needs a kick in the pants! (More on the blog tomorrow.)
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📸: Somewhere in Portugal 🇵🇹 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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#soulscripts #soulscriptssisterhood
There are tons of new faces around here, so I'm popping in for a #fridayintroductions on a SATURDAY.  I know.  Give me a box, and I'll shatter it.
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➕ICED COFFEE: For life, people.  With lots of cream, no flavoring (you, non-purists), and very little ice.  Added bonus: It prevents me from those awkward, sweaty-sitches where you HAVE to finish your coffee but its not cold anymore, and you're like, "Wait, am I wearing grey?  Do I have to raise my arms any time soon?  How well do I know these people?  Which brings me to...
➕I'M AWKWARD: Like, Person: "Hi!" Me: "Good! And you?"...
➕WIFE: You guys.  I married up.  He cleans (and not just in the gym!) Not to mention, he's a stud, when I mostly only workout because I like tacos.
➕PASSION: I'm a writer who teaches; I love to help people translate their heart and passion into words and mission.  I love to connect with other go-getters who...
➕LOVE JESUS: I mean, one of my greatest joys of growing up has been to grow in relationship with the God who gave up everything so that I could be with Him forever.
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Alright, your turn!  Introduce yourself, and tell me something real! Photo cred: @lindsaydavenportphotos ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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#dfwblogger #beating50percent #tnchustler
It’s Friday Eve, and I’m already thinking about what I’m going to eat this weekend. 🙈🤦🏼‍♀️ Am I the only one who does that? •••
This weekend’s brunch won’t look quite like @magnoliatable, but a girl can dream, right?! (Does anyone else have a lifelong dream to make phenomenal homemade biscuits? 🙋🏼‍♀️)
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Pop some emojis in the comments and tell me about your weekend plans! ☕️👫🥓🌮
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#darlingweekend #magnoliatable #brunchgoals
Okay, I don’t do things like this... but YOU GUYS. I have to. @carlyjeanlosangeles is giving away two $500 gift cards, and I have to have one. I’m obsessed with their mix-and-match friendly clothes (aka capsule wardrobe), and I need all the things from their newest launch. They also have awesome stories that show you how to wear things. They’re basically like stylists in your pocket. BOOM. Pick me.
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