Not many people in my adult life know this, but I used to be a musician.
I mean... I used to sing.
I mean... I am technically still a singer, but I haven't performed in awhile.
Has there ever been a part of you that you're not sure is a part of you anymore? That's what singing, and music in general is for me. It was my love, my escape, my dream for so long, but so much has changed since then.
Anyway, this post is not about that, it's just what I always think of when I hear Jason Mraz sing. My voice teacher, Carrie, is OBSESSED with Jason, and it rubbed off on me. I love everything about Jason's music, but I mostly love that it feels like coming home, it harkens me back to a simpler time in my life, but the words of his songs always make so much sense of life as I know it right now.
My favorite one is called "Beautiful Mess," and my favorite line is from the chorus:
"And what a beautiful mess this is,
It's like picking up trash in dresses."
Now, the picture that pops into my mind as I hear this line is slightly hilarious. I see girls donning prom dresses, the hemlines lightly floating over dirt and grass on the side of a highway in the mountains, holding those highly dangerous trash-poking spears.
The juxtaposition Jason creates, however, is one I find myself returning to time after time.
You can't separate beauty from mess.
In fact, it's quite possible that beauty is magnified because it placed itself among that mess in the first place, trying to clear out everything that covers up the true beauty.
To be quite honest, working with teenagers feels a lot like my favorite lyric.
There is possibly never a beautiful day followed by a messy one, or vice versa. Every day is a mixture of beauty and mess, often even in the same breath, impossible to sift growth from faltering, even love from hate. Without one, we don't have the other. Without the contrast, we can't see difference. Without division, we can't see true unity.
I hope it's okay to sometimes share incomplete thought processes, because most of mine are.